
EQUIP: Week 3- Cultivating the Community of God
“So then you are no longer strangers and aliens, but you are citizens with the saints and also members of the household of God.” (Ephesians 2:19)
Week 3: Day 1 – Christ In Community
The gifts he gave were that some would be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, some pastors and teachers, to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ, until all of us come to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to maturity, to the measure of the full stature of Christ. (Ephesians 4:11-13)
Today is day one of the third week of our eight-week equipping experience, and this week we are exploring the second of six priorities for what it means to be the Church, the Church at work. Think of these priorities as strands of DNA, all six are essential, inseparable, and equally important and yet each one uniquely contributes to the identity and function of the Body of Christ.
In the week that follows, we will be specifically looking at our God-given responsibility to conserve and cultivate our relationship with one another as we follow Jesus together. At Bel Air Church, we believe we are designed for Christian community. [i]
In fact, community is one of our core values. We believe Christian community is so much more than just being in proximity with others. As we embody a life of community, our identity in Christ unifies us as we follow Jesus every day, and everywhere, with everyone…together.
“Christianity means community through Jesus Christ and in Jesus Christ. No Christian community is more or less than this.” – Dietrich Bonhoeffer [ii]
We belong to one another. We need one another. We are united to one another. All of this is true and none of this would be true if it were not for Jesus Christ. Life in Christ is life together.
Let’s hold onto this thought as we begin our daily rhythm.
As we seek to be joined together in Christian community, we follow our daily PRAY(er) rhythm (P.R.A.Y.), ‘P’: PAUSING to be still. ‘R’: REFLECTING on Scripture or learnings. ‘A’: ASKING God to help us and others on the journey and ‘Y’: YIELDING to God’s transformative work in our lives, no matter the cost. [iii]
P. R. A. Y.
Pause
As I enter prayer now, I pause to be still; to breathe slowly; to recenter my scattered senses upon the presence of God.
Jesus, my Lord, as I say ‘yes’ to your invitation to follow you today, I ask you would fill my heart with your love, open my mind to your purposes, and give me the courage to follow you again, today.
Read & Reflect
”…you are no longer strangers and aliens, but you are citizens with the saints and also members of the household of God, built upon the foundation of the apostles and prophets, with Christ Jesus himself as the cornerstone. In him the whole structure is joined together and grows into a holy temple in the Lord; in whom you also are built together spiritually into a dwelling place for God.” (Ephesians 2:19-22)
“…you are no longer strangers and aliens.” Let’s sit with this for a minute. We could have either blown past it or it could have tripped us up. For many Christians, the idea of once being a stranger or an alien never even crosses our minds.
A “stranger” is not part of the family. An “alien” is not part of the community. Yet, Paul reminds us, we too were once “strangers and aliens.” What happened? What changed? How are we now “members of the household of God?”
In one word, Jesus.
“Christ brought us together through his death on the cross. The Cross got us to embrace, and that was the end of the hostility. Christ came and preached peace to you outsiders and peace to us insiders. He treated us as equals, and so made us equals. Through him we both share the same Spirit and have equal access to the Father.” (Ephesians 2:16-18)
Jesus is our righteousness. Jesus ends the hostility. Jesus is our peace. It’s through Jesus that we embrace one another as brothers and sisters. When we were once “strangers and aliens” we are now Christians bonded together in community because of Christ. Jesus changes everything.
According to the Apostle Paul, one primary purpose of Jesus’ work on the cross was for us to be united together in Christian community.
Ask
Journal and/or self-reflect:
- What are some images I associate with the words “stranger” and “alien”?
- How does it feel for me to identify myself with these terms?
- How does this passage change my view of myself and others?
- Why, according to Paul in Ephesians 2:16-22, does the blood of Christ make unity possible between strangers and aliens, outsiders and insiders?
- What are some practical ways in which I can be a peacemaker with those in my life group and the larger church community?
As we read Scripture, especially Paul’s letters to New Testament churches, we’ll often hear him address the community as “brothers and sisters” or “Beloved.” It is such a common phrase that we can easily take it for granted. Yet, we can never overemphasize the significance of both.
It’s not what we are as Christians, our spirituality or our faithfulness that is foundational for our community. What determines our relationship as siblings is whose we are in Christ. One is a brother or a sister to another only through Jesus Christ. We are siblings with one another because of what Jesus did for me and to me; you are my sister or my brother through what Jesus has done for you. Our relationship with one another is rooted solely in what Christ has done for both of us.
“I have community with others and I shall continue to have it only through Jesus Christ. The more genuine and the deeper our community becomes, the more will everything else between us recede, the more clearly and purely will Jesus Christ and his work become the one and only thing that is vital between us.” – Dietrich Bonhoeffer [iv]
Christian community is not an ideal which we must realize; it is rather a reality created by God in Christ in which we are invited to participate. Let’s yield to this invitation today.
Yield
As I return to the invitation to follow Jesus every day, and everywhere, with everyone, Holy Spirit, open my heart to yield to your call to participate in your family today. I recognize I am not entitled to be called your child or your Beloved because of my own righteousness or through anything I have done. You, Jesus are my righteousness and my reconciliation.
I ask that you renew my heart, my eyes, and my understanding to see my brothers and sisters as your “Beloved” and vital companions on my discipleship journey. I yield to your call to unite myself with those I once considered “strange and alien” just as you have united me with you. As one who is deeply loved by you, I yield my life to you once again. Today marks a new day in a lifelong journey of following you with my sisters and brothers. Amen.
Scripture Memorization
Over this next week, we will memorize Ephesians 2:19 (NRSV) together. This passage will help frame the ongoing conversation throughout the week. To begin our practice, let’s write or text the following verses verbatim in a journal, notecard, on a post-it note, or make a note in your smart device:
“So then you are no longer strangers and aliens, but you are citizens with the saints and also members of the household of God.”
Spiritual Practice
Over the following week, we will develop the spiritual practice or habit of ‘spiritual friendship’ that is core to a life of following Jesus.
After Jesus invited his disciples into vulnerable friendship with himself, he commissioned them in pairs (Luke 10:1-8). Faithful, courageous and vulnerable friendship lies at the very heart of the gospel. Following Jesus happens best together, two by two.
While we are most certainly responsible for our own growth in discipleship, we do not mature into the people God wants us to be without the gifts that real spiritual friendship provides. Moral support, spiritual encouragement, accountability and Christian care are absolutely essential for our faith to be kept strong and grow.
But, where do we find them? In the stress and craziness of our hectic lives, we seldom carve out time and space to share ourselves with one another. Even our life group can get so consumed with discovering what Scripture has to say that we forget to discover what God is doing in the person right next to us.
This lack of spiritual friendship is an example that this kind of friendship doesn’t just fall into our laps. It has to be intentional. It requires intentional prayer and faithful action.
As we seek to develop spiritual friendships, let’s each enter into intentional prayer asking God to develop in us a desire to know and be known by one another.
Take some time now to pray. We will be exploring this practice more in the days to come.
Week 3: Day 2 – Spiritual Family
“It is not a place that is called church, not a house made of stones and earth…It is the holy assembly of those who live in righteousness.” – Hippolytus (3rd century) [v]
The Church is a community. Even more, the church is a covenant people of God. Beginning with Israel and continued through the church, God calls out a special people. This community is ‘called out’ to represent who God is and the way God longs for humanity to live for the healing and wholeness of the world (1 Chron. 28:8).
The Greek word for ‘church’ is ekklesia, which means ‘called out ones.’ Early followers of Jesus recognized that what God started through the assembly of Israel God continued through Jesus establishing a ‘called out’ community, the church (Matthew 16:18). Much like Israel and the early followers of Jesus, we too are a “covenant people of God.” [vi]
Let’s hold on to this thought as we practice our daily rhythm.
Pause
As I enter prayer now, I pause to be still; to breathe slowly; to recenter my scattered senses upon the presence of God.
Jesus, my Lord, and my Leader, as I engage with your Word I ask that you would speak to me, that you would call to me, and that I would have the faith to follow you today.
Read & Reflect
The early followers of Jesus saw themselves as a special people, a people united together because they had been called out of the world by the good news of Jesus to belong to God. This belonging to God is described in a wide variety of ways:
The Nation of God – “But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s own people, in order that you may proclaim the mighty acts of him who called you out of darkness into his marvelous light.” (1 Peter 2:9)
The Body of Christ – “Now you are the body of Christ and individually members of it” (1 Cor. 12:27)
The Temple of the Spirit – “like living stones, let yourselves be built into a spiritual house, to be a holy priesthood, to offer spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ.” (1 Peter 2:5)
No one nation, ethnic group, or location is ever to be considered “God’s own.” Instead, the church, as a covenant community, transcends all space and time. Yet, it is most clearly revealed in a visible, local group of believers who covenant with God and one another to be the local expression of the church.
The church is formed when those of us who have said ‘yes’ to Jesus’ call to “follow me” come together. It then becomes our job as a spiritual family to nurture, raise up, and encourage the faith of all who come to participate in it. And when we who are pledged in relationship with God and one another, come together as faith-facilitating people that the church becomes a community.
The foundational bond for us as a community is primarily vertical. This means our primary focus is not on what we are, but on whose we are. God, in the person of Jesus Christ, has given us God’s-own-self and has taken us as God’s-own-people (see the covenant promise in Lev. 26:12). Jesus has already declared his devotion to us through his demonstration of love on the cross. As we each declare our loyalty back to Jesus as our Lord, we become a community who shares this fundamental commitment.
It is because of this shared allegiance to Jesus as our first love that we also share a commitment to join together to be the people of God known as the Body of Christ (1 Cor. 12:12-31). This community is no place for independent individualists. Rather, we now see ourselves as a redeemed people joined to Jesus and to one another in the bond of love known as the covenant of grace (Romans 14:7-8; Romans 12:5). This bond, this horizontal promise to live and love like Jesus with one another, cannot materialize unless we conserve and cultivate authentic Christian community.
Ask
Pause and Pray
Holy Spirit, speak into my life that I might renew my covenant with you once again. Bring to light the things and people I have made covenants with. Help me to realign my commitment to you and your people as I seek to follow Jesus again today.
“Therefore I want you to understand that no one speaking by the Spirit of God ever says “Let Jesus be cursed!” and no one can say “Jesus is Lord” except by the Holy Spirit.” (1 Cor. 12:3)
What Jesus started, the Spirit continues. The Holy Spirit is the facilitator of the covenant that forms the foundation of Christ’s community. The Spirit is the one who brings us to confess “Jesus is Lord.” And it is this Spirit who bonds and links us together as one unified people (Ephesians 4:3). As we come together as a family of faith, we get to experience the Holy Spirit’s active and present work in making us a spiritual community.
Journal and/or Self-reflect:
- Who or what have I made covenants to?
- What is different between a covenant and a contract?
- Have I ever made a covenant with Jesus to covenant with his people, the church?
- How does it feel for me to know that I belong to a spiritual family where my siblings make a covenant with me as well?
Yield
Since the time when Jesus ascended into heaven, our risen Lord continues calling together his church on behalf of God’s agenda through the facilitation of the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit is the one who organizes the church as a Christian community and spiritual family.
Yielding Prayer
Holy Spirit, the one who woos me into community, I am reminded of how appreciative I am of you once again. I am reminded of all the ways you have brought new life to my heart, sparked faith in my mind, spoken to the deep places of my soul, and have united me to the people of God. I yield myself to your invitation to covenant with your people. Lead me in your love and power as I recommit myself to you and to my spiritual family as I seek to follow Jesus every day, and everywhere, with everyone.
Father, help me to live this day to the full, responding to your covenant of love. Jesus, help me to give myself away to others, modeling your lordship in my life with everyone I meet. Spirit, help me to live by your bond, knowing I belong to you and your people. Amen.
Scripture Memorization
As you memorize Ephesians 2:19 (NRSV) this week, once again let’s write or text the following verses verbatim in a journal, notecard, on a post-it note, or make a note in your smart device. However, this time say it out loud as well:
“So then you are no longer strangers and aliens, but you are citizens with the saints and also members of the household of God.”
Spiritual Practice
As we seek to develop a habit of ‘spiritual friendship,’ let’s consider the following as we seek to cultivate and develop spiritual friendships:
- Pray and ask God to lead you to someone with whom you can learn and practice courageous vulnerability.
- Look around your current life group or those you interact with through church. Is there anyone who stands out as a possible trustworthy companion?
- In your journal, name these individuals and identify the qualities that make them a trustworthy companion.
We will continue to explore this practice more tomorrow. In the meantime, thank God for these people whom God has placed in your life.
Week 3: Day 3 – God’s Transformational Community
“While awaiting the grand conclusion of the story, the church, empowered by the Holy Spirit, is called to reenact the loving obedience of Jesus Christ…to serve as a sign of God’s redemptive purposes for the world.” – Richard B. Hays [vii]
As a Christian community, in our life together, we embody an alternative way to live and love that models God’s redemptive purposes in the world. Through living and loving like Jesus, we cultivate and encourage a transformational culture. So when we refer to Christian community, we are not talking about merely a concept, or a social club but a concrete communal manifestation of God’s transformative work within our community.
Developing and protecting this transformational way of life is core to what it means to be the church at work.
Let’s hold on to this idea as we practice our daily rhythm.
Pause
As I enter prayer now, I pause to be still; to breathe slowly; to recenter my scattered senses upon the presence of God.
Jesus Christ, my Source of peace and my brother, as I dive into your Word I ask you would mold my heart, sharpen my understanding, and fill me with love as I follow you today.
Read & Reflect
God’s vision for church (ekklesia) is a community of people engaged in the process of being transformed into the likeness of Christ not just on Sundays, but every day, and everywhere, with everyone. But, what is required for this kind of transformation? How do people change and grow?
As a Christian community, we are transformed more and more to live and love like Jesus through the power of the Holy Spirit at work among us. Three key ingredients are used by the Holy Spirit to grow us as individuals and as a community: Grace, Truth and Time. [viii]
Grace – Grace is the unmerited favor of God toward us as people. This love is something we have not earned and do not deserve.
“Grace is something you can never get but only be given. There’s no way to earn it or deserve it or bring it about any more than you can deserve the taste of raspberries and cream or earn good looks or bring about your own birth.” – Frederick Buechner [ix]
Grace is the first ingredient necessary for being transformed into the image of Jesus. It is the relational aspect of who God is. Grace is all about an accepting and unearned loving relationship.
Maybe we have experienced this kind of love and grace with those in our community. The kind of relationship where we can be exactly who we are. We don’t need to pretend or hide our thoughts or feelings; the relationship isn’t based upon how well we perform or how well we measure up. In fact, we don’t have to do anything in order to be loved. This kind of grace-filled relationship is one where someone knows the real me, and loves me anyway.
If grace is the relational aspect of God, then God’s truth is the structure that gives us guidance.
Truth – Truth is what is real; it tells us how things really are. As the church, we are a community that is the primary recipient of God’s truth and divine direction. When God communicates, the message is most often addressed to us as a community. All throughout the Scriptures, God is deliberately communicating God’s own will and way to a people who live this out in relationship with one another (Deut. 7:12-16; Jonah 3; Matthew 5; Acts 2; “One Another” Commands).
Transformation breaks down when we separate grace and truth from one another. Grace without truth becomes licentiousness. And yet, truth without grace is harsh, shame-filled, and judgmental. Only when we cultivate a community that is filled with both grace and truth will we experience and exemplify the kind of transformational culture God longs for.
“Grace and truth together invited us out of isolation and into relationship. Grace, when it is combined with truth, invites the true self, the “me” as I really am, warts and all, into relationship. It is one thing to have safety in relationship; it is quite another to be truly known and accepted in this relationship.” – Dr. Henry Cloud [x]
Transformation only comes through the power of the Holy Spirit. And it is through following Jesus in the Spirit that we can realize these two ingredients of growth: Grace and truth. “For the law was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ.” (John 1:14; 16-17)
Time – With each passing minute, day, week, year, and decade, we become more and more aware that transformation takes more than just time (Luke 13:6-9). We know this on a very elementary level. Consider what would happen if we simply put a bandage over a wound and just gave it time. If a week were to go by and we never addressed it, never cleaned it or put ointment on it, what would we find if we took the bandage off? Most likely, we would find a gross, festering, and oozing old wound that is just as bad, if not worse, than it was when it first occurred.
Time, like a bandage, in and of itself, does not in fact heal all wounds. Time is not a healer and time does not bring about transformation. Yet, time is required for transformation. Only when time is used in conjunction with grace and truth can it bring about the kind of life transformation the Holy Spirit longs to do in and through us.
We can’t just expect to offer grace to someone who has been battered by truth their whole life and expect them to be instantly healed from their shame based view of God. In the same way, we can’t simply offer someone the guidance of God’s Word and expect a zap of lightning to turn their life around once and for all. However, when we are in a grace and truth filled relationship with God and one another, over time we will experience the healing transformation that God longs for us as a community.
Ask
Pause and Pray
Jesus, reveal to me areas where I am functioning as an individualistic disciple. Expose in me the areas where I relate with my Christian brothers and sisters that don’t reflect your way and vision. Fill me with your love as I follow you by engaging with your transformational community today.
Journal and/or self-reflect:
- What is my relationship with grace and truth? Have I experienced one at the expense of the other?
- What has my experience been with grace without truth, truth without grace, and time without either?
- In what environment have I experienced the most transformation in my life with Jesus?
- What would it look like for me to cultivate this kind of environment in my own Christian community?
Yield
Jesus’ character as being full of grace and truth is best illuminated when we understand his way of life in the context of community. As a people who seek to live and love like Jesus, it’s vital that we nurture and protect God’s transformational community.
Yielding Prayer
Jesus, I surrender myself to you again – my heart, my mind, my soul and my strength, my work life, my home life, who I am with my friends and my neighbors. All that I am, and all that I have. I give it all to you, and ask that you reveal to me your love and guidance through your transformational community. Transform me more and more to reflect who you are as I follow you every day, and everywhere, with everyone.
Gracious God, help my brothers and sisters, all of us, to live this day to the full, being available to you, in every way. Jesus, help us to give ourselves away to others, revealing your love to everyone we meet. Spirit, transform us by your power, filled with grace and truth as we follow Jesus in all we do and say. Amen.
Scripture Memorization
As we memorize Ephesians 2:19 (NRSV) this week, let’s write or text the following verse while filling in the missing words by memory:
“So then you are no longer _______________ and ____________, but you are _______________ with the saints and also ________________ of the household of God.”
*Look back to Day 2 and see how you did. We don’t want to simply get through Scripture, but we want Scripture to “get through” us.
Spiritual Practice
As we seek to develop a habit of ‘spiritual friendship,’ it’s important for us to also look at ourselves as friends. Take some time now to journal and reflect on the following:
- Would I consider myself a trustworthy companion?
- What qualities do I possess that enable others to feel ‘safe enough’ sharing their lives with me?
- What areas in my character or ways of relating with others do I need to change in order to be a more trustworthy companion for someone else?
- Pray and ask God to lead someone to you so that they can learn and practice courageous vulnerability.
We will continue to explore this practice more tomorrow. In the meantime, thank God for the opportunity to be a trustworthy companion for someone else.
Week 3: Day 4 – Cultivating Courageous Community
“It’s impossible for one person to know everyone, for one person to be known by everyone, but it is possible for everyone to be known.” – Pastor Drew
Christian community is so much more than just being in proximity with others. It’s about embodying a life where our identity in Christ unifies us as we follow Jesus together. As we seek to cultivate and protect Christian community, we will be required to display courage as we engage in real relationship with each other.
Courage is living as a follower of Jesus regardless of how vulnerable that makes us. It is far easier to have a “personal relationship” with Jesus where you never have to be vulnerable with anyone else other than Jesus (and no one will know if you even do that!). However, courageous vulnerability is vital for Christian community to thrive. It’s through courage that we allow for our brokenness to be a witness to others of the transformational power of God at work in our lives.
This type of community doesn’t just “happen” because we meet together. Christian community has to be intentional, it requires risk, it opens us up to pain, but only in this courageous community will we ever really experience the love of Christ.
Let’s hold on to this idea as we practice our daily rhythm.
Pause
As I enter prayer now, I pause to be still; to breathe slowly; to recenter my scattered senses upon the presence of God.
Lord Jesus Christ, my Healer, and my Counselor, as I dive into your Word I ask you would open my heart, awaken my mind, and fill me with courage to nurture the church today.
Read & Reflect
Imagine if we were at a wedding, it’s likely we would hear the officiant recite vows that reflect some variation of, “to love, cherish and nurture one another. In good times and in bad. In sickness and in health. In whatever circumstance life throws at you.” Does this sound familiar? These words are so common and yet they are so profoundly important to the health of any relationship.
Think of a relationship like a rose. One doesn’t have to be a gardener to know that roses require attention, food, water, and sunlight in order to grow. What happens when a rose garden is neglected? It dies. It no longer blossoms. It’s no wonder marital covenants include “nourishment” as one of the three promises.
God knows that nurture and nourishment are vital for life. That’s why God gave us this very responsibility when cultivating Christian community. When we feed and prune our relationships with one another, in time we will be able to enjoy their beauty!
Christian community is vital for the life of every believer.
“And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near.” (Hebrews 10:25)
As we read this many of us may be thinking, “oh great…more meetings. I’m already meeting’d out. The last thing I need is another meeting, virtual or otherwise!” This is not the kind of “meeting” the author of Hebrews is talking about. Listen to how Eugene Peterson describes it in his Message paraphrase:
“So let’s do it—full of belief, confident that we’re presentable inside and out. Let’s keep a firm grip on the promises that keep us going. He always keeps his word. Let’s see how inventive we can be in encouraging love and helping out, not avoiding worshiping together as some do but spurring each other on, especially as we see the big Day approaching.” (Hebrews 10:22-25)
“Let’s see how inventive we can be in encouraging love…not avoiding worshiping (meeting) together…but spurring each other on…”
Love is not a concept. Love is a verb, an action that requires us to be in community in order to both practice and experience. Our sisters and brothers need each one of us. We need to know and be known by one another. Each one of us are vital for the nourishing and nurturing of a loving Christian community.
Consider how Jesus nurtured community with his friends:
“Jesus took with him Peter and James and his brother John and led them up a high mountain, by themselves. And he was transfigured before them, and his face shone like the sun, and his clothes became dazzling white…suddenly a bright cloud overshadowed them, and from the cloud, a voice said, “This is my Son, the Beloved; with him, I am well pleased; listen to him!” (Matthew 17:1-2, 5)
“Then Jesus went with them to a place called Gethsemane; and he said to his disciples, “Sit here while I go over there and pray.” He took with him Peter and the two sons of Zebedee (James and John) and began to be grieved and agitated. Then he said to them, “I am deeply grieved, even to death; remain here, and stay awake with me.” (Matthew 26:36-38)
When it comes to cultivating courageous community, the beautiful thing about Jesus is that he never invites us to do something he isn’t willing to do himself. Rather, Jesus, God in the flesh, models for us what it looks like to nurture and nourish courageous Christian community by vulnerably sharing of himself both in good times and in bad, both in the peaks and in the valleys.
“I am deeply grieved, even to death; remain here, and stay awake with me.” – Jesus
As we consider Jesus’ revalation and request, it’s important to note that he didn’t display this depth of courage with all twelve of his disciples. This kind of vulnerability was reserved for a select few of his closest friends (Peter, James and John). However, by modeling this depth of courage, Jesus invites us to risk and experience the beautiful challenge of real relationships as well.
Speaking of real relationships, picture Jesus with his twelve friends on a road trip! One can only imagine how real it got! Think about all the stories told around the campfire, the inside jokes, the friends bickering one moment and then laughing out loud the next. And yet, we can imagine because we’ve been there. Their story is our story as we follow Jesus together. Life together, really living and experiencing those unscripted and unexpected moments of knowing and being known is what makes Christian community so beautiful.
As Jesus demonstrates, choosing to make ourselves vulnerable is not a sign of weakness, rather it is a display of strength, joy, and freedom. Through this kind of courageous vulnerability we are invited to open ourselves up to really being known and to truly experiencing the amazing love of Christ (John 15:15; 21:15-17).
Ask
Journal and/or self-reflect:
- Based upon today’s reflection, if someone were to ask me, “why church” how would I respond?
- What qualities within community help to foster “courageous vulnerability”?
- What hinders me from being vulnerable in both good times and bad?
Pause and Pray
Jesus, reveal to me those you’ve placed in my life to know and be known. Expand my understanding of my responsibility in cultivating Christian community. Remind me of all the ways in which I have experienced your love through those you’ve placed in my life. Reenforce my courage to live into the kind of vulnerability you revealed to me today.
Journal and/or self-reflect:
- Why do I think Jesus revealed his peaks and valleys with only three of his twelve disciples?
- With whom do I share my highest peaks and deepest valleys of life?
- What would it look like for me to lead my community in “courageous vulnerability”?
Yield
The truth is, if Jesus needed his friends, we also need one another. Courageous Christian community is so vital for spiritual transformation that we can’t afford not to cultivate it. This kind of community has to be intentional, it requires risk, it opens us up to pain, but only in this courageous community will we ever really experience the transformational love of Christ through the love we share with one another. Nourishing and nurturing this kind of life together isn’t always easy, but it’s the work of the church and it’s definitely worth the effort.
Yielding Prayer
Jesus, I open myself up to you again – my heart, my mind, my soul, and my strength. All that I am, and all that I have. I vulnerably reveal it all to you and ask that you know me. I yield myself to your invitation to engage courageously with the Christian community you’ve provided me so that I might experience the abundant life that can only come from following you every day, and everywhere, with everyone.
Father, help me to live this day to the full, being vulnerable before you, in every way. Jesus, help me to give myself away to others, sharing myself with the trustworthy. Spirit, help me to live by your power, modeling courage as I follow Jesus through the peaks and valleys of life. Amen.
Scripture Memorization
As we memorize Ephesians 2:19 (NRSV) this week, write or text the following verse while filling in the missing words by memory:
“So then ____________ are no longer _______________ and ____________, but you are _______________ with the ___________________ and also ________________ of the ____________________ of __________.”
*Look back to Day 3 and see how you did. Remember, we don’t want to simply get through Scripture, but we want Scripture to “get through” us.
Spiritual Practice
We are at the point in our journey of developing ‘spiritual friendship’ that we need to make a choice. It’s time for us to decide on who we are going to risk sharing ourselves with. As Christians, we know community is more than proximity with one another, rather it’s a transformational relationship, a place of knowing and being known.
- Look back at your journal from this past week. Select the person(s) whom you would like to approach to be your trustworthy companion.
- It is possible to have more than one, but don’t choose more than three.
- In an effort to not have those closest to you feel threatened by your vulnerable sharing with your new trustworthy friend, consider choosing a person of your same gender.
- Remember, this person is in no way obligated to say ‘yes’ to your invitation. But the fact that you’ve identified them as trustworthy is something to be grateful for.
- Take some time now to pray for this person and thank God for them.
We will take the next step regarding this practice tomorrow. Remember, you are not alone.
Week 3: Day 5 – The “One Another” Life
Let’s start today with some ‘fun facts.’ Did you know the term “one another” although two words in English is only one word in Greek? It’s used one hundred times in 94 New Testament verses. Forty-seven of those verses give instructions to the church, and 60% of those instructions come from Paul. [xi]
“I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” (John 13:34-35)
“Love one another.” “Bear one another’s burdens.” “Forgive one another.” The New Testament provides us with a lot of “one another” instructions: things we should all do in our effort to cultivate Christian community. In our reflection yesterday, we explored the importance of cultivating courageous Christian community. Today, we will learn of the tools we need to get started.
Let’s hold on to this thought as we enter into our daily rhythm.
Pause
As I enter prayer now, I pause to be still; to breathe slowly; to recenter my scattered senses upon the presence of God.
Jesus, the one who called me into this beautiful spiritual family, as I engage with what it means to cultivate community, thank you that you are already actively working to nurture health. You desire that every one of your followers experience the fruit of being bonded together in you. Help me to develop the discipline and the courage to live into your life-giving way. Amen.
Read & Reflect
As we continue to participate in Christian community, it won’t take long for us to realize that we are a broken people. Some have the expectation that the church should be a perfect people where we always get along, are void of any conflict, and no one ever gets hurt. Not to burst our bubble, but this has never nor ever will be the church (this side of eternity). Sure, we might grow in how we relate with one another and therefore sin against one another less, but we will never be sinless.
Neither Jesus, the apostle Paul, nor any of the New Testament writers had this expectation. Quite the opposite! They expected that we would have problems relating with one another. That’s why they wrote the “one another” commands. If all it took was faith in Jesus and some doughnuts for us to get along (let’s be honest, we love our Sunday doughnuts) then they never would have written these in the first place.
In fact, when we look at these verses, a few relatable themes show up:
Unity: one-third of the “one another” commands focus on us learning how to get along:
- Be at peace with one another – Mark 9:50
- Gently, patiently tolerate one another – Ephesians 4:2
- Confess sins to one another – James 5:16
- Be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another – Ephesians 4:32
Love: Another third of the “one another” commands instruct us to love:
- Love one another – John 13:34; 15:12, 17; Romans 13:8; 1 Thessalonians 3:12 and more…
- Through love, serve one another – Galatians 5:13
- Tolerate one another in love – Ephesians 4:2
- Be devoted to one another in love – Romans 12:10
Humility: About 15% stress an attitude of humility and respect among the people of God:
- Wash one another’s feet – John 13:14
- Give preference to one another in honor – Romans 12:10
- Serve one another – Galatians 5:13
- Clothe yourselves in humility toward one another – 1 Peter 5:5
Ask
As we explore these commands beyond today, we need to make sure we read them in context! These commands come from Jesus, Peter, John, Paul, and James, and they’re scattered across the New Testament. We can’t just stop at this surface level list. We need to dig into these passages to really see what the author was talking about.
Journal and/or self-reflect:
- What surprises me about the list of “one another” commands?
- Which one is the most intimidating?
- How does this list compare with my experience with Christian community?
- How seriously have I invested myself in this Christian community?
- What would I imagine would result if I actually cultivated these practices?
Pause and Pray
Holy Spirit, I hear your invitation to lead through vulnerability in an effort to cultivate courageous Christian community. Thank you that you offer me the opportunity to say, “Yes!” to you. I confess that I have reservations and hang-ups. I open myself up to be used by you once again
Yield
Of course, Jesus and the apostles give many more instructions to the church on how to cultivate courageous Christian community; however, if we put these three “one another” tools of unity, love and humility to work, we’ll be off to a good start.
Yielding Prayer
Jesus, my Lord, and my Example, I choose to follow your courageous vulnerability in my Christian relationships. All of the ways I relate with others, the ways I am healing and the ways I’ve been destructive – I share it all with you and ask that you use me to nurture and protect a community of love and healing. I join you in the long list of God’s people and recommit to following you in all I do and say.
Father, help me to live this day to the full, loving others because you first loved me. Jesus, help me to give myself away to others, modeling your way with everyone I meet. Spirit, help me to be sensitive to the needs and concerns of others, becoming a trustworthy person as I follow Jesus every day, and everywhere, with everyone. Amen.
Scripture Memorization
As we memorize Ephesians 2:19 (NRSV) this week, try and write it from memory.
“So then you… ”
*Look back to Day 4 and see how you did. Remember, this isn’t a competition or a tool to judge your spiritual maturity. This is a practice to help us get into Scripture and let Scripture get into us.
Spiritual Practice
Now that we have selected the person(s) we would like to invite to be our spiritual companion and friend, it’s time for us to take the next step. This next step involves the risk of asking the person whether he or she is open to the possibility of cultivating courageous community with us on a regular basis. Remember, we’re not asking someone to be our lifelong companion, but rather asking them to be our spiritual friend for this season.
Helpful tips for when as we ask:
- This initial request needs to be clear, straightforward and direct.
- We need to set clear expectations and commit ourselves to being a trustworthy friend to them as well.
Becoming trustworthy faithful spiritual friends is an adventure into personal vulnerability. It is not always easy. We can expect that there will be misunderstandings, disappointments, and unmet expectations. Like any real adventure, the destination and outcome cannot fully be anticipated. However, when we are with someone who accepts us as we are, listens attentively to what we share, is committed to mutual interaction, and doesn’t try to “fix” us, courage is given for the first steps in this life-sharing exercise.
Remember what we’ve learned this week. Without faithful friendship, we fail to nourish, nurture and protect God’s masterful community, the church. Without the means to practice the “one anothers” of Scripture, we become malnourished and fail to become all that God intends and risk spiritual decay. It’s through faithful friendship, Jesus befriends us with his encouraging, life-nurturing presence. “For where two or three are gathered in my name, I am there among them” (Matthew 18:20).
Week 3: Sabbath Experiment – The Wealth of Companionship
“During Sabbath, we specifically honor those precious things – courage, creativity, wisdom, peace, kindness, and delight – that grow only in the soil of time.” – Wayne Muller [xii]
As you enter into your Sabbath experiment today, listen to the words of our sister Theresa:
Last year was a tough one for us. Our single friend Grace was fighting cancer, and we were totally involved in her care, her decisions, and most often, her emotional health. Three women took major responsibility for coordinating and providing her care and support. It was a very draining experience, especially as it became clear to us that we were caring for a dying woman while she and her doctor still insisted that she was not, so no hospice care was available.
I was the only one of the three who had both a job and a family at home, so I snapped first. I suddenly realized that I needed spiritual support as much as Grace did, and just praying by myself wouldn’t do the trick. I needed someone else there with me – I don’t know why – but I didn’t want to make a big deal of it. So I called an acquaintance – not a close friend but a woman from church whom I respected – and asked her if she would go somewhere and pray with me. And she did.
The two of us sat out in the woods that afternoon as I poured out a long oral prayer to God. She responded with a prayer of her own. We must have spent thirty minutes in prayer, but at the end of it I literally felt lighter. I had passed my burden to God and let go of it. Things were a little easier after that. I don’t know why it was important for someone else to be there as witness and support, but it was. [xiii]
As we rest today knowing that we are surrounded with a wealth of spiritual companionship, let’s consider what Wayne Muller in his book Sabbath has to say:
When we are lost or afraid, we can tend to isolate, to bear down and get through it, to make it on our own. Jesus says, “When two or more are gathered, there I am in your midst.” When we enter into companionship with another, something larger than ourselves is born. Choose a few people whose companionship you will seek when times are difficult. Jeff, a busy corporate executive, has a “phone friend” he calls whenever he feels lost or off-center, and needs a loving voice from outside the corporate world. Even if nothing significant is said, the care and company give birth to calm and release. Resolve to seek out those you love whenever you lose your way. One of the most precious gifts we can offer is to be a place of refuge, to be Sabbath for one another. [xiv]
Consider calling a friend today in order to be a place of refuge for them as they share their true selves with you. Ask them questions that go beyond the surface.
Enter in, inquire, listen, and experience Jesus ‘in your midst.’
Week 3: Discussion Questions
- How would we articulate this week’s essential priority for us as the church at work?
- How might we engage this work as the church in our workplaces, our neighborhoods, and our homes?
- What are some important principles we have learned this week?
- How have we been further equipped regarding our relationships with God, one another and our church community?
Notes
[i] Book of Order (PCUSA), F-1.0304, The 6 Great Ends of the Church.
[ii] Dietrich Bonhoeffer, excerpts from Christ in Community, taken from Devotional Classics, pg. 271.
[iii] P.R.A.Y. inspired by Lectio 365.
[iv] Dietrich Bonhoeffer, excerpts from Christ in Community, taken from Devotional Classics, pg. 274.
[v] Hippolytus, Daniel 1.17.6-7, as cited in J. G. Davies, The Secular Use of Church Buildings (London: SCM, 1968), 4.
[vi] Stanley J. Grenz, excerpts from The Church – The Eschatological Covenant Community, taken from Theology for the Community of God, pg. 464.
[vii] Richard B. Hays, excerpts from Three Focal Images, taken from The Moral Vision of the New Testament, pg. 193.
[viii] Dr. Henry Cloud, Changes That Heal, pgs. 17-42.
[ix] Frederick Buechner, Wishful Thinking: A Theological ABC, (New York: Harper, 1973), 33.
[x] Dr. Henry Cloud, Changes That Heal, pg. 25.
[xi] Jeffrey Kranz, excerpts from All the “One Another” Commands in the New Testament, taken from the Overview Bible Project, overviewbible.com, 2014.
[xii] Wayne Muller, excerpts from A Deeper Wealth, taken from Sabbath, pg. 116.
[xiii] Wayne Muller, pg. 118.
[xiv] Wayne Muller, pg. 118-119.